


You have to grow up because the world needs more women like you.

by GenesisHardy



Series: Immeasurable [2]
Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Community College, Developing Relationship, F/M, Growing Up, Long-Distance Friendship, Long-Distance Relationship, Melancholy, Post-Episode: s06e13 Emotional Consequences of Broadcast Television, Slow Burn, Washington D.C.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:20:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27975706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GenesisHardy/pseuds/GenesisHardy
Summary: "Annie knew what she wanted to do, and she had the opportunity to do it. All she needed was to grow up, take control, and actually do what she had set out to. She couldn’t keep running back to Greendale, no matter how much she missed it."While in DC, Annie struggles with balancing her new life with her old. How much does growing up mean being independent, and how much does it mean holding onto the past?
Relationships: Annie Edison & Jeff Winger, Annie Edison/Jeff Winger
Series: Immeasurable [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2019217
Comments: 8
Kudos: 26





	You have to grow up because the world needs more women like you.

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't sure where I wanted to take this when I first started part 2, and although I'm not sure that I'm 100% happy with this, I think it turned out okay. I think Annie has always been a very driven, independent person, but starting a whole new life across the country can be overwhelming, especially if you aren't really talking to the people that matter to you. So that's kind of what I wanted Annie to wrestle with here. I also think that Annie had to be the one to decide how much space was enough between she and Jeff. Not that Jeff's opinion on the subject isn't important, but Annie still needs to experience so many things that Jeff already has. I'm not saying that Jeff doesn't have more room to grow, but his life is a little more stable at this point. I don't know. I'd love to hear what all of you think!
> 
> I don't own anything. All of these characters belong to Dan Harmon, NBC, and Community.

_“Anytime, kiddo.”_

_The silence stretched between the former study group members, neither one really sure what to say next. How long had it been since Jeff called her kiddo? Was this an easy loophole through the loneliness and separation? Was it easier for him to reframe their relationship when the distance became too much to bear? Annie couldn’t say either way. What she could say with certainty, however, was that after saying goodbye once again, the distance between them seemed much more expansive than it had when she called him early that morning._

————

Snow plows sputtered down the streets of DC as a cold wind blew from the northwest with the promise of another blizzard. Streetlamps glowed under a coating of heavy, wet snow, and in the distance, the faint sounds of St. Patrick’s Day celebrations wafted out of the bars. Despite the dark, and the ice, and the cold, crowds of people crossed the streets and crowded into restaurants, leaving the burdens of everyday life in their darkened office buildings until the weekend was over. A few miles away, a young woman stared out of her frost-covered office window in the J. Edgar Hoover FBI Headquarters.

It wasn’t that Annie didn’t want to join in the festivities. She had always loved joining student clubs, supporting causes, and celebrating even the smallest occasion. And it wasn’t that her coworkers hadn’t invited her out to celebrate—they had. She didn’t know everyone in the office, but she had found a small group of friends. She had even spent time with these coworkers outside of the office once or twice before. Today, however, Annie found herself declining the invitation for drinks.

“Well, if you change your mind,” Georgia said, “we’ll be at The Eight Ball. We always stay until closing, which is like, 3AM or something.”

Taking the paper with the pub’s address, Annie thanked her coworker. Although Georgia was Annie’s mentor, they became friends almost immediately; both women had been in the same internship program (Georgia two years before Annie), both were originally from Colorado, and both had an unexplainable love of purple pens. “I might stop by for a little bit,” Annie said. “I don’t know. We’ll see.”

“You’re missing out, and not just on an awesome night with your incredibly talented mentor. Luke is going to be there,” Georgia dramatically replied, a grin on her face that clearly revealed her plan to set up her coworkers if it was the last thing she did. But when Annie didn’t answer, Georgia said, “Alright, well, if I don’t see you tonight, have a good weekend.” As she pulled on her coat and picked up her purse, Georgia knew it was better not to push Annie on the issue. There would be other opportunities, anyway. And so Georgia walked out the door with the small group headed for The Eight Ball.

Annie turned back to her work, and before long, the office was empty. Though her window was foggy and covered in intricate frost designs, she could tell that the sun had already set and the festivities were in full swing. Annie looked at the address, and for a moment she thought about going, but she was tired. Besides, there was still a lot of work to do. Ultimately, she decided it would be best if she finished her paperwork and went straight home.

Another two hours passed before Annie began to pack up for the weekend. She filed each paper and put each labeled folder into the appropriate drawer, which was also labeled. She tucked her purple pen back into her Greendale Community College coffee mug, leaving her desktop perfectly clean and organized. Even her computer desktop was free of clutter, every document saved in a long chain of folders inside folders inside more folders. 

“Your organizational skills are impressive,” her boss had said earlier that day during her six-month performance review. “The only thing I would say is that, while this job does require a certain level of organization and control, it’s easy to burn out. I know a lot of this is still new, and I’m not upset with your work. I wouldn’t be surprised if, in the next few years, you were up for a promotion. What I _am_ saying is be careful not to put so much stress and pressure on yourself. Keep up the good work, but remember to relax every once in a while. Sometimes things happen in this job that no one can control.”

“Okay. I’ll try,” Annie responded.

But that had been twelve hours ago. Sighing, Annie rubbed her eyes and looked at the small clock Jeff had sent her for Christmas. Two clock faces sat inside a rectangular, wooden box, one set to DC time—1:37AM—and the other to Greendale time—11:37PM. She was a little surprised that Jeff would buy her something so sentimental. Gifts were obligations, he’d always said. But the clock didn’t imply obligation. She wasn’t sure what it was meant to symbolize, or if it was supposed to symbolize anything at all. Regardless, she had come to think of it as both an encouragement for where she was in life and a reminder that she had someone else moving with her in the world, even if they were in different time zones. 

Annie’s gaze moved from her clock to her phone. It was an unspoken rule that they didn’t call each other—a rule she had broken six months ago, and a rule she had almost broken several times since, and a rule she wanted to break again now. It would be easy enough to call Jeff. He had sounded so proud when he told her about the extra classes he was teaching and the debate team he was now coaching. She wanted to ask about his second semester, and if it was a coincidence that he chose the debate team over everything else. Did he still think about their first kiss? Or when he’d looked at her—really looked at her—when they were preparing for the second round of the debate? Did he remember their platonic shoulder holding after their loss in the first round or, after their win, when they’d softly smiled at each other before going in different directions? 

With the phone against her ear, Annie’s hand hesitated over the keypad for a moment longer. What if he didn’t think about any of that anymore? What if none of it mattered to him? What if he’d let her go and moved on and left her alone and forgotten and on her own? Or worse, what if she’d been the one to leave him? 

_I’ll always be here if you need me_.

His parting words from their last phone call echoed around the dimly lit office. But this echo soon faded, as all echoes do, and in the silence, another thought appeared: _You have to grow up_.

Annie had said the phrase to herself since she was eighteen. She said it when she decided to go to rehab. She said it when her parents kicked her out, and when she signed her first lease. She said it on her first day at Greendale and on her last day in Colorado. And now, sitting at her desk in the middle of a dark office building in a city she was still getting used to, Annie found herself saying it again. 

_I want stories and wisdom, perspective. I want to have so much behind me that I’m not a slave to what’s in front of me_ , she had said to Jeff on her last night at Greendale. She meant it when she said it nine months ago, and she meant it now. Annie knew what she wanted to do, and she had the opportunity to do it. All she needed was to grow up, take control, and actually do what she had set out to. She couldn’t keep running back to Greendale, no matter how much she missed it.

Shaking her head, the young woman dialed the cab company’s phone number.

Because of the holiday, the wait for a cab was much longer than usual. The cold northwestern wind still blew, but it now carried a light flurry of snowflakes with it. The snow plows, though they would return in a few hours, had finished the road outside the FBI Headquarters hours ago, leaving a mound of salty, brown snow the length of the street against the curb. As Annie stood in wait outside the office building, she pulled her coat tighter. Although she could hear the distant sound of traffic and crowds, she became aware of a certain silence that seemed to blanket the street in front of her. It was as though the world really was moving around her, leaving her as forgotten and separate and alone as she feared. 

It wasn’t a conscious decision to call—if it had been, she wouldn’t have called. 

She wasn’t surprised when he didn’t answer, but all control she had felt moments ago vanished. If the look of her desk was any indication, Annie should have been very much in control. Instead, she stood alone on a dark street on the other side of the country from the only stability she’d ever had. 

“This is Jeff Winger. Leave a message if you want.”

“Jeff? Hi, it’s Annie…” the young woman trailed off, unsure of what to say next. “I guess I don’t really know why I called. I probably shouldn’t have called this late, now that I think about it.” She paused and looked around the street, watching as the traffic light changed from red to green. “My first performance review was today. It actually went fairly well; my boss was really happy with how I’m doing so far. He even said that if I just gain a little more experience, I might get promoted in another year or two.”

At this, Annie stopped. Six months ago, it was her mention of staying in DC that shifted the conversation. She knew that Jeff believed the job was perfect for her, but she could hear how his voice grew a shade quieter, more solemn. Annie wasn’t sure that she completely understood why, but she knew that the 2500 miles seemed much farther some days. And now, standing in the snow, it felt very far. Wanting to close the distance, Annie changed the subject.

“I’ve made some friends over here. I mean, they aren’t the Greendale Seven, but who is? They’re going out tonight, actually, for the holiday. Are you doing anything? Does Britta still work at that bar? I don’t even remember what it’s called.”

Maybe it was this confession, or maybe it was her intense awareness of the distance, or maybe it was something else entirely that brought Annie to tears. Her breathing became short as her throat began to close and her vision blurred. Tightening her grip on her phone, Annie felt the little control she had left vanish. 

_You have to grow up…_

“I’m sorry, Jeff. It’s just…” Annie sobbed, “I don’t know. I mean, I’ve been through worse than this, right? I’ve… I’ve got my dream job, and I’m making friends, and things are good, but… I miss you. And Abed, and Britta, and everyone at Greendale. And I miss my parents, and my brother. I miss having stupid adventures, and I miss never actually studying in the study room, and what I wouldn’t give to just make a diorama instead of answering the phone, or filling out hours of paperwork, or sitting in a meeting where half of what everyone says just goes straight over my head. I still want the stories, and the experiences. I want to be an adult, but I also want my childhood—a real childhood—and I don’t think I’m ready for all of this. What if I’m not ready for this?”

And it was at that moment that Annie, broken and alone and in tears, remembered what Jeff told her five years earlier: _You have to grow up…because the world needs more women like you_.

With these words, Annie’s breath, though ragged, started to stabilize. As she wiped her eyes and tried to think of something to say, Jeff’s voicemail box beeped. “Message length reached. To send message, press 1. To record a new message, press 2. For more options, press 3.”

For a moment, Annie simply thought about Jeff’s words. There was no admission that any of this would be easy. Growing up wasn’t simple. For Annie, it never had been. But his words had never signaled the end of their relationship; rather, they signaled a change in their relationship that came with both study group members growing up. Even then, Jeff knew how much Annie would achieve. And it wasn’t that he wanted her to grow up alone. It wasn’t even that he wanted her to grow up so they could be together. Whatever their relationship was, it wasn’t going away. It hadn’t after the model UN when he’d first spoken these words, and, with her confidence returning, Annie knew that their relationship wouldn’t disappear now. 

Annie took a deep breath. Regardless of her past struggles and her current fears, the world still needed her. She was meant for something more. And even though “something more” was terrifying, there was someone else moving with her in the world. She would get the experiences—the stories—she longed for, but she decided not to do it alone anymore. What good were her stories if there was no one she could tell them to? 

Pressing 2 and relaxing her grip on her phone, Annie began to record a new message. “Hi, Jeff. It’s Annie. I’m sorry it’s late. It’s just, a lot has happened, and it feels wrong not to talk about it with you. Look, all my life, I’ve had to grow up faster than everyone else, and I guess I just got used to doing it on my own. It was easier, you know? But then I joined our study group, and I finally had a family. I didn’t have to do everything by myself. When I got this opportunity, though, it just seemed easier to cut myself off again. You were right to give me space, and I’m grateful for all of it, but… I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to be lonely, and maybe it’s childish to say out loud, but I think it’s more childish for us to not even talk.”

Down the street, Annie saw her cab pull away from the stoplight and make its way towards her. “I’d love to hear about how your classes were, and although I’m sure the debate team didn’t do as well as we did all those years ago, I want to hear all about it.” Annie smiled. As the cab pulled up next to the sidewalk, spraying the salty, slushy snow onto the ground in front of her, Annie said, “Well, I have to go, but maybe you can call me tomorrow?”

Hanging up the phone, Annie stepped into the cab.

“Where can I take you,” the cab driver asked.

“The Eight Ball, please,” Annie replied. Jeff had always wanted to teach her billiards. Maybe she could surprise him.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to give myself a few days, and then I'll start working on part 3, which will probably be from Jeff's POV again. If you have any thoughts or comments, please let me know! You were all so kind for part 1 (thank you!), and I love hearing constructive criticism. Also, I'm keeping a list of quotes to base each of these sections on, so if you have a quote from the show that you think would apply to this story, please let me know! Thanks and have a great holiday season!


End file.
